PRACTICING FATHERHOOD

Five Practices for the Art of Fatherhood

Happy Father’s Day to all of you who are “practicing fathers.” I like that term — “practicing fathers”. I borrowed it from the medical and legal professions. A doctor will say I’m practicing medicine, or we’ll ask, where is his medical practice? A lawyer will say, I’m practicing the Law, or we might ask, where does she practice Law? Why is that?

fatherhood

 

The Practice of Fatherhood

I think it’s because they recognize that what they do is hard and complicated and none have arrived. So they are always practicing their craft, honing their skills, always learning, always improving.

 

So it is with fatherhood. I’m a practicing father. I’ve been doing it for more than twenty-five years and I’m still practicing. So, let’s think about this for a minute — what does the idea of practicing entail?

 

My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me. — Jim Valvano

 

The Five Traits of Practicing

1. There is a symbiotic relationship between learning and doing.

Practicing requires both doing and learning; study and acting; reflection and practice.

2. There is an acknowledgment that you don’t know everything.

Humility is built into the concept of practice. People who think they have arrived have no need to practice. Those who understand that they are life-long learners never stop practicing.

3. There is an expectation that you will make mistakes.

Mistakes are an essential part of the process of practice. Mistakes help you get better. Mistakes are a great way to learn.

4. There is a built-in hope that you will get better at it.

The fact that you keep practicing is evidence that you haven’t given up. You may not see much progress at times, but you keep trying because you know that there is a chance you will get better. Hope is built into the practice effort.

5. There is a celebration when the practice pays off.

There is no better feeling than to have poured countless hours into something (or someone) and then to experience a win.  Be sure to celebrate those wins. They will be some of the happiest and most fulfilling times of your life.

 

One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters. — George Herbert

 

I’ve been a father for more than twenty-five years and I am still practicing. I am still experiencing all of the above. I will be a father to each of my three children until the day I go to heaven. At each stage of their lives, I have to re-invent myself as a father — I have to change strategies — I have to grow — I have to get better. So much depends on it. So, I’ll keep hitting the practice field.

 

As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. — Jesus Christ (John 15:9)

 

Happy Father’s Day to all those great Fathers who are still practicing fatherhood!